Ms Anona chokes on her tea – Finding a Suitable Boy – encounter 2
Not long after the boy with the Orange hair disaster my mum recieved a call from a family friend, an Aunty who I hold in very high regard. For the sake of this blog. let’s refer to the aunty on the phone as Aunty F. Listening in on the conversation I quickly established that she was talking to my mum about a young man she knew, the son of one of her friends, Aunty S.
About a week prior to Aunty F’s call, we had actually seen her at her nephew’s wedding where Aunty S and her son were also in attendance. What materialised from the conversation is that Aunty S had apparently seen me at a couple of weddings over the years and had come to the conclusion that I was NOW suitable for her 29 year old son and that she wanted to make some contact, get in touch with my mum and have us round for tea as she was very keen to get the ball rolling. It so happened that Aunty S had also been a school friend of my mum’s and although they had lived in the same area for 15 odd years, she had never felt the need to re-acquaint herself with my family till now. How’s that for a mum with an agenda?
That aside, on Aunty F’s authority that the guy was decent, I agreed to meet him but on my terms. Hence tea at his mothers was definitely not on the cards. Instead, Aunty F’s neice and I arranged for us to all to go to a local cafe.
On the day of our meeting all seemed to be going well, conversation seemed to be flowing and although on first impressions I wasn’t particularly physically attracted to Aunty S’s son, I went with the flow and tried to keep an open mind..only for my open mind to be shattered into a million pieces when it came to ordering our meal.
Aunty S’s son had chosen to take us to a quaint cafe, in lovely settings, all good on that front. The only problem was the lack of choice when it came to catering for Muslim diners – as Halal was clearly a foreign concept to them, but also to Aunty S’s son.
After searching through the menu and a short discussion on what we were going to select, Aunty S’ son began relaying our order to the waitress. I opted to play it safe and head straight to dessert…can’t really go wrong with Double Chocolate cake and Ice cream. Aunty S’s son on the other hand proceeded to order a supersized bacon sandwich.
At first I thought my ears were deceiving me, but as our order arrived and I began to see Aunty S’s son devour this sandwich with my very own eyes, alarm bells began to ring. With every bite it was almost as if I could see Porky materialise in front of me. Like the scene from Lord of Flies, with the pig on the pole.
It was there and then on that first bite of that sandwich that I knew Aunty S’s son was a no-goer. Not only was he not physically attractive to me but he was also way off the mark in his spiritual/islamic journey. To compromise on one requirement is fair enough but to compromise on two is just not happening! (192)